


Even Through This

by IRegretNothingAndEverything



Series: Through This Verse [8]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Aaron needs to be protected, Asshole Jefferson, But Smol, He is a smol bean, Lafayette will kill a man, Multi, Not as smol as Alexander, Protective Alexander, Trans Aaron Burr, Transphobia, non-binary Lafayette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-12
Updated: 2017-04-12
Packaged: 2018-10-17 22:02:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10603149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IRegretNothingAndEverything/pseuds/IRegretNothingAndEverything
Summary: Aaron was just like anyone else. He could break, and sometimes its one macaroni fucker who causes it.Its great he has four people who love him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING  
> TRANSPHOBIA AND A PANIC ATTACK FROM SAID TRANSPHOBIA  
> I am not trans myself, but I have multiple friends who are that attempt to satiate my writers curiosity with how things feel when trans, so its all second hand trying to see it from a first hand P.O.V.  
> Please forgive me about anything that is wrong with this, and tell me so that I may fix it. Still, there is very intentional Transphobia in this, and thus, a warning is needed.  
> WARNING OVER
> 
> Okay Im done.

Aaron stared at the email that Jefferson had sent him a few moments ago. They were, unfortunately, working together on a project that Washington had given them a few days ago, with "Dont kill anyone." being basically the only rule. Jefferson had pulled up a first draft, and had to put both names down. From another person, someone who hadn't known him at the start of college, the name down was a simple mistake, perhaps from typing too fast. 

To Aaron, it was harmful. It burned his eyes to see, and made his chest feel like it was caving in on him. To Aaron, Jefferson had attacked him for a reason. 

Andrea Burr. A simple, elegant name, chosen by Ester Burr. A nice name. But he was Aaron Burr Jr. He had adopted his fathers name when he found out why he was like he was. 

Andrea Burr was the name of a frightened young girl who was overly girly in hopes of fixing something that didn't need fixing. She had died long ago and was left in the memories of others. 

Aaron Burr was the man who had come from the ashes of Andrea Burr. Aaron Burr was the one who knew nothing was wrong with him, and knew he could be who he wanted. Aaron Burr had people who loved him. 

Slowly, he sighed and stood. He knew Jefferson would not listen to him if he sent an email back. Aaron also knew he was the type of person who would lay over and fix it when Jefferson allowed him of edit the paper, but this... this he needed to fix in person. He didn't want to, but had to talk to Jefferson. 

Aaron stopped by Alex's office, only to see that he and Laf where cuddling on the couch too big too move from the office. They were Skyping Herc and John, who had gone to Hercules's studio for the day. He smiled slightly at seeing each one of his significant others, then walked away from the doorway before they noticed him. 

He stopped in front of the door to Jefferson's office, staring at the door for a moment. He could do this. Somewhere in the back of his mind, there was a voice begging Aaron to not, to just for back, fix it yourself, no need to start drama, but he silenced it. Jefferson had started this one. 

Without knocking, a normally dangerous endevour, but Madison wasn't at the office today, so he was safe, Aaron opened the door that led to Thomas's office. The man say at his desk, typing away. He didn't even look up when Aaron entered.

Taking a quick breath, steadying himself, before standing straighter. "Fix it Jefferson."

"Fix what?"

"You know what I mean when I say fix it. There is only one thing."

Jefferson turned to face him. "Why don't you do it yourself? You're a pushover anyway. After all Andrea-" The name was like fire dragging across his chest, stealing his breath- "That's all you've ever done. Let people walk all over you."

He couldn't face him, Aaron could watch him with that stupid grin on his face. He felt like he was on fire, he couldn't stay like this, he had to get away-

"Fix it, or I will contact Washington on the matter." The words weren't his, they felt like they where coming from someone else. He felt his body move, and he was going down the hall, tense, barely gasping in air, tears streaking down his face. 

He barely made it to his destination, but the laughter spurred by something someone has said spurred him on. Aaron stumbled into Alex's office, shaking so badly that it made it difficult to lock the door to the office. 

Rarely had he been so directly misgendered. Anyone he had met when he still went by Andrea had understood and switched to Aaron without thought. Anyoje after assumed he had always been Aaron, which, in a way, was correct. 

Laf was next to him, trying to get an answer from him, but the questions melted together, and he barely made a word out from what they were saying. There was a hand on his ribs, over part of his binder, a question in Laf's eyes.

No, he needed the binder, he needed it-His breath got faster, and he curled a hand over Lafayette's, pushing his hand away from the hooks keeping the binder on, shaking his head frantically. 

As much as he hated it, the only thing he could stutter out was "Jefferson." 

Aaron closed his eyes tightly holding onto Laf' shirt tightly, reaching in the direction of Alex, soon feeling Alex's calloused hand in his own. Urgently, he pulled the smaller closer and held him close, attempting to call his own breathing, timing it with Lafayette. 

His mind drifted to other times as he slowly started calming down. 

College, when he first met Lafayette, the bouncing Frenchman who first told him of other ways, when he was still Andrea, scared and in such a poofy dress it basically killed him. The look of mirth on Laf's face when they said that they were non binary, and explained such things to him. 

Two years later, when Andrea broke, and began to spill everything to Herc and Laf, who were the only two there to witness his break. Alex and John came back to the apartment to find Andrea gone, Aaron in her place, looking for binders with Lafayette. 

Another year and the first time when he kissed Alex, even though he was in a relationship with the other three by then, and spilling everything he felt for the four. Within a week, he was in the poly gays, happier than he had been in ages. 

The first time he had been comfortable enough to be even slightly naked around them. 

How supportive and comforting they had been when his surgery came around. 

How loving they all where in general. 

As his mind raced with all these memories, Aaron's breathing calmed, and slowly came back to himself to find Alex and Laf both singing softly in French. 

"Hey..." His voice croaked, but Alex still flew into a sitting position, pulling Aaron close. 

"Hey yourself. What happened?" 

Aaron sighed, shifting and glancing over to where Herc and John waited on Skype for any sort of sign that he was alright. "Come on. Over here. They have the car, and I would really like to get home." 

Alex stood, pulling Aaron, and this Laf, up, and settled them both on the couch before allowing himself to be pulled into it. 

Slowly, being sure to keep holding both of them, Aaron recounted what happened, keeping his breathing matched to Laf's the entire time. 

By the time he finished, everyone around him was angry enough to kill, but Aaron kept them calm enough, knowing Jefferson would get what was coming to him. 

The car ride home wasn't a long one, but still, Aaron, as Laf gently undid the hooks of his binder, let the gently sway of the car lull him into sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Again, please tell me anything that needs to be fixed in this. Like, can I technically say Frenchman when Lafayette is non binary. Im pretty sure about that one standing for all of the French populace, but... 
> 
> ALSO BRAVE AARON IS MY LIFEBLOOD
> 
> LIKE YES GO BBY, IM SO PROUD OF YOU. 
> 
> Also, again, name the fic(s) that the Too Big Couch is from :) 
> 
> ONE MORE ALSO; Would anyone want a second but with Laf or Alex fucking shit up?


End file.
